Friday, September 22, 2006

Hey man, want some speakers?

On my way to work today I stopped to fill up on gas. As I waited a black Chevy SUV pulled up, with the passenger hanging out the window. He asked me something that I couldn't quite hear.

Two white guys with shaved heads, small build driver, medium build passenger, "tribal" tattoos on both, back seat full to the roof with large cardboard boxes. "Well, they can't intend on tossing me into the back, and they'd be pretty bold to do anything at such a crowded gas station. They probably just need directions..." I thought. I got within 6 feet of the car, and asked him what he said.

"Man, you want some speakers? FexEx screwed up, and I got a double shipment, and I don't want to give them back to my boss! You interested?"

"Naw, I'll pass."

As the car then sped away I heard him say, "why would he pass?" It looked like it got on the freeway.

Hmm, why WOULD I pass? I dunno, maybe because receiving stolen goods is against the law. (yes, even if you didn't know it at the time) Maybe because your story didn't make any sense. Maybe because you only drove up to me; someone who looked like he would be "cool" about picking up some possibly hot merchandise. Maybe because people don't usually conduct business with total strangers at a gas station. Maybe because your driver looked like he had a horde of Red Chinese after him. Maybe because holding on to a package stolen off of someone's front porch is a bad idea (especially if you're the neighborhood petty criminals, which I'd bet money they were). Maybe because you might be able to convince the cops that some dude paid you to steal the package, and by the way, here's his license plate number. And finally; maybe because when a deal is too good to be true, it probably is...

Better luck next time guys, hopefully you'll get rid of the goods before the police match someone missing a shipment of speakers with the license plate number I gave them.

1 comment:

defiant_infidel said...

What is it they say about similar minds? I was sure I would read that you got and turned in their license number by the post's end. Sure enough... You never disappoint me, Sir.