Monday, October 02, 2006

"Big Tobacco" Hatemongering

I hate the word hatemongering. It's an alarmist word that rarely fits its use. But for this, I make an exception.

A review of the latest anti-tobacco ad
Scene: Open slowly zooming into an office, with a voice over indicating a job interview is in progress. Cut to inside the office where a balding executive interviews a prospective employee across a large desk.
Executive: "You're resume is impressive, but I want to know if you can think on your feet... Here you've got your affluent gay couple, disenfranchised African-American, and a potato salad... (it doesn't really say that, I just can't remember what it says) Who would you market our new cigarettes to?"
Interviewee thinks for a moment then spots a picture behind the executive, and points to it: "How about those guys?"
Executive: "Those are my kids. You'd market to my kids?"
Interviewee: "... I just-"
Executive: "That's just the kind of out-of-the-box thinking we're looking for!"

Gee guys, after watching that ad, I'm not sure WHAT to think of "Big Tobacco"... While the ad was about as subtle as a sledgehammer to the back of the head, I think they could have gone a bit farther. Let me take a crack at it...

Scene: Hell. Red colored, cave-like walls, with fire flaring up from the ground, the wall layout is similar to that of the previous ad. The camera slowly zooms towards an open door with a voice-over indicating a job interview is in progress. Cut to inside the office where Satan, prince of darkness, interviews a prospective employee across a large desk made of human bones.
Satan: Now that we've finished dining on the souls of unborn children, we can continue the interview. Now, as an employee of "Death-Bringing Tobacco," who would you market our cigarettes to?
Interviewee: CHILDREN!
Satan: Of course, but how would you do it differently?
Interviewee: I would use candy flavors, bright colors, cartoon characters, ice-cream trucks, and prenatal nicotine injections!
Satan: I'm getting a boner just thinking about it! You're hired, and if I may add; we sure like getting children addicted to cigarettes!
Interviewee: Hahaha! We are bad men!
Satan: Muhahaha! We're worse than child molesters!
The two laugh maniacally for a few seconds.
Satan: Lets go punch babies, and cut the legs off puppies!
Interviewee: I brought my brass knuckles!

I think that would just about sum up the intent of the commercial. I realize that everyone wants someone to hate, and people don't have a problem hating someone unpopular, but some of these commercials take it a bit too far.

I'm smart enough to know fear/hatemongering when I see it. It's childish, it's uncalled for and, frankly, insulting that they think they can convince people with these ads.

I don't smoke (unless I'm on fire), and have no strong feelings about the tobacco industries, but I don't like to see groups (smokers) being beat up simply because what they do is unpopular. Honestly, the only convincing reason I'd have to take up smoking would be to piss off the Californians around me. I can't think of any better way to exercise my right to do unto myself as I please than by doing something hazardous to myself!

If you've got an argument, use facts to make the point. Making unbelievable situations up to prove your point is a good way to lose credibility.

2 comments:

blogagog said...

As an ex-smoker (so far), I blame the tobacco industry for convincing me it was a healthy alternative to taking vitamins. They're evil! $245 million should cover my pain and suffering.

Seriously though, it makes no sense blaming the producer for what the consumer purchases. There is some hidden desire that they are playing to. They're not creating a new one. If you don't believe me, try marketing turd flavored gum. See how well you can mesmorize the masses.

Fletch said...

Maybe they should try to ban the turd flavored gum and see how the sales go? :)