Friday, February 02, 2007

Cigar Smokery Part 2! Revenge of Castro's Ghost!

I've been sniffing for long enough. Yesterday I pulled my larger-than-expected partially smoked Cuban cigar out of the brushed aluminum (looking?) cigar tube my girlfriend got me for Christmas, and fired it up.

I only puffed on it for a short while before putting it out and returning it to it's tube.

I suspect I got more enjoyment from the after-smell and after-taste than from the actual puffing. Perhaps I should have just limited myself to only enough to get the taste in my mouth and smell on my fingers.

The smell faded from my clothing rather quickly (much to my girlfriend's pleasure), but the memory and the taste would linger much longer.

Even now I remember fondly the spicy flavor, and smell.

I knew that I had an addictive personality, so I wanted to make sure that even if I longed for one, I'd be able to resist. No problems there. A few months without a cigar, while wanting the flavor a few times a week is pretty good for me. Good enough that I felt no guilt as I struck the match yesterday.

Last night I told my girlfriend that I had heard that cigars were not as bad for you as cigarettes. She said that she'd heard the opposite. So I hopped on the net today and looked around.

A quick Google search revealed that cigars were not only as deadly as cigarettes, but they also were MORE deadly. Additionally, one could expect a 10% shorter life span if one were to smoke a cigar, hold a cigar in ones' mouth, or be within 20 feet of a lit cigar. Further troubling news was discovered when I found report after report noting that cigars cause erectile dysfunction, minor blindness, male pattern baldness, ugliness, getting kicked in the shin, and makes your nipples fall off! Even minor cigar smoking causes paralysis, uncontrollable bowels, impotence, your fingernails to fall off, your retinas to detach, your limbs to fall off and attack you under their own power, and an assortment of voodoo curses to be placed on your children, spouse, extended family, coworkers, mailman, doctor, and people who owe you money. Also, you have to fight Metal Gear.

It seemed that I couldn't get a single straight answer. My research results were flooded with biased "studies" and interestingly-worded "findings". Then I remembered this. Guess it applies to cigars too.

While it may be that cigars have much of the same bad stuff cigarettes do, I don't think there's much risk in my incredibly infrequent smoking of a quarter of a cigar.

As for those idiots and their agenda; they can all go blow a goat. I'll smoke just to piss them off.


Anonymous said...

Well, it could go one of two ways. If you inhale, even a little bit, not even on every puff, it is almost as bad as cigarettes. The tar and nicotine in the tobacco as pretty much consistent, but you don't get all the chemicals they put in cigs. I generally fall into this category with lighter, sweeter cigars.

If you don't inhale, you're not in any real danger. Going to the range exposes you to potentially more harmful materials in the forms of gaseous lead and carbon.

Fletch said...

I tried inhaling a few times, but didn't like the idea of burning smoke entering my lungs, nor the prospect of damaging my lungs enough that the burning ash wouldn't bother me. Plus, inhaling didn't add anything to the experience besides coughing and watering eyes.

I think I'll just be lighting the cigar, waving it around, taking a few puffs, and putting it out. Just enough to get the flavor in my mouth, and refresh my memory.

Thanks for the info Josh!