Tuesday, November 07, 2006

VOTE F.U.D.!!!!11

Fear/Uncertainty/Doubt for reelection!

That's the name of the game now.

All morning all I could hear was cases of complications that some voting locations had. Of course, when the workers had too many people, or had some kind of simple complication, they had to send people to another voting place. NOW if there is even the slightest hitch in a voter's giddiyup, it's voter disenfranchisement! Somehow, we've been running elections for hundreds of years without problems, and now a poll worker can't sneeze without a voter bitching about being "turned away" or "intimidated"...

Yeah, so, um, I went to the place for the votes, and stuff? And like, there was this like, it was like a huge line. So I'm all like, well this is a Republican plot to keep me from voting! Cuz e'ryone knows that, like, not that many people, like, vote. You know?


I was going into the polling place, which was in a RED HOUSE, by the way! Anyways, I was going there, and they had these flowers, and the flowers were attracting bees, and there was this bee there right by the door. So it hit me, this is a democratic district, and the house is red, so clearly these Republicans were trying to keep democratic voters AWAY! I don't know if I'm alergic to bee stings, so I could like die! They were trying to kill me!


I was going to vote, and then I saw that they were using those voting machines made by that Republican-owned company, Diebold? And I was all like, "I'm not voting on THOSE things! It's gonna make me vote for Bush!" And this lady was all like, "Der, Bush isn't even on the ballot" And I was all like, "I'm not using that thing!" And so the lady gave me this paper ballot, and it was all like, confusing because I had to like punch holes! And I was like, "What is this? I need a hole puncher to vote? And you all are going to know it was me, and you're going to rip up my ballot because I didn't vote for Bush!" And the lady was like, "You put it in this box, and we don't have the key." And I was like, "Sure you don't, NAZI!!!" And then she said something about like her surviving the holy-cost and I was like "Whatever!" And I left. I am so, like totally distenfrenchized.


STFU n00bs...

If conservative measures win, everyone will be screaming foul play, if the liberal (Sorry, I mean "progressive") measures pass, well, it was a perfectly fair result, and any claims of foul play are republican talking point neo-con bushitler religious-right vast right-wing conspiracy.

Though, I suppose time will tell if the Republicans will be sore losers too...

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