Thursday, December 09, 2004

Nerds

There is little that pisses me off more than nerds.

I know a lot about computers, I appreciate computers, I am intelligent, I am a great learner, and am quick at mathematics. But have no delusions... I AM a GEEK. I am NOT a nerd. Nerds are people who think that having more knowledge than another person makes them better than other people. They may not admit it, some might not even know it, but they do. But the people around them know, they can tell it in the tone of their voice.

How can you tell a Geek from a Nerd???

Easy. A geek will know about things. A nerd will know about EVERYTHING.

I went to the store to buy some tomatos--
Did you know that tomatos are actually fruits? But I think it should be another classification because of the acid content-- *SLAP!*

Generally speaking, a geek may annoy you because you find geeks annoying. But a nerd will annoy you because he just WON'T SHUT UP ABOUT THINGS HE "KNOWS".

This includes things like asking questions and then answering them...
We definately can't do it this way. Why? Because it wouldn't be bandwidth efficient. Why? Because the use of a connection-less protocol can increase speed, but the gains in speed wouldn't outweigh the possiblity of lost packets. Why? Because connection-less protocols don't use the three-way-handshake method of data transmission. Why? Because... they... just don't.
When they get stuck like that, a solid hit with a 2x4 to the back of the head will usually get back to where they should be... Just like a western digital hard drive! Oh! I'm so bad! :)

The above was something I had to endure in a recent staff meeting, and the catylist for this post. I was rather annoyed that our staff meeting time was being absorbed by these idiots trying to sell us their crap, while other, more pertainent, topics get pushed back another two weeks.

Another thing... Nerds are fidgety (sp?) they're always twitching, or moving their hands excessively, and all the crap.

Nerds think that if they've got a thought in their head, they've got to share it with everyone. Nerds finish your sentances, and jump at the chance to correct you to make themselves feel superior by being correct.

Geeks are more like cool nerds. We know what they know, but we keep our mouths shut until it comes time to dispense enlightenment. :)

Hence the phrase: Network Guru

We sit atop a mountain of legacy hardware in deep meditation, contemplating cool names for our nethack characters. When someone draws near to us, it is, in most cases, not to ask for wizdom, but to force it from us, by stating idiotic nonesense. This, of course, causes us to strike them down with our superior knowledge, and pragmatic thinking. I'm getting goose-bumps!


Actualy, now that I've written it, I'm not sure that I agree with it. Geeks vs Nerds, I mean. Maybe I just used "nerds" to put a common label on the kind of person I described, I mean, there ARE humble nerds... I think that there should be another classification between Geeks and Nerds due to their high acid content--[Hit with 2x4!!!]

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