Ok, so this was lost in my moleskin. I though I had lost it somehow...
3-4-06 (UBER BELATED!) (yay!)
It's odd to see sooo many different people in one place. Majority of the people here are here for getting tickets from those photo ticket things. The instructor is teaching in an anecdotal fashion. I enjoy it, and I think everyone else does too. It really makes the time pass more quickly and makes the experience more pleasurable. I wonder if instructors also find straight reading from the manual boring, so they use anecdotes to cover the points they must. I wonder, if the instructor preferred anecdotal teaching, but didn't have any meaningful anecdotes if the instructor would make up stories to make the learning more enjoyable for us, and the teaching more enjoyable for themselves. I like that I didn't look at the instructor as a teaching robot, but as a person who may not prefer their job.
[the following is not part of the journal entry]
One thing I remember was with so many people in there for the photo red-light ticket machines, there was a lot of ill will toward them. When the instructor asked who thought they were a good idea, a percentage of people raised their hands. When asked who thought they were a bad idea, a percentage of people raised their hands. When asked who didn't care, I was the only one to raise my hand. "So much for wallflowering my way through this..." I thought to myself. The instructor asked me why I didn't care, and before I had a chance to get aprehensive at being the deviant, and develop some kind of present-company-friendly response, I spoke the unpalatable truth:
"Because it's still breaking the law, whether you were caught by a cop or a camera. Thinking you shouldn't be punished because it was one or the other is silly."
To which she [the instructor] replied, "...Well there you have it!"
Showing posts with label journal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label journal. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
More often before, less often lately...
4-13-06 (belated journal post)
More often lately I've been getting an overwhelming feeling of loss. Maybe loss isn't the right word. Maybe it's just incompleteness. I just get that whole rat race feeling. I go from day to day with few highlights, and think to myself that things will be different soon. Well I just kind of figured out that that is unlikely. It was a "this is your life" moment. I just got the feeling that I was trying to keep busy to avoid something, and I didn't want to avoid it anymore. I feel like I should be doing more, but I'm not sure what "more" is. There's something I miss doing, but have never done before. There's some intangible round peg out there, just waiting to make me whole. But what and where is it? Does anyone else feel this way?
5-9-06 (less belated journal post)
I've been drawing more, and have started scanning and coloring my sketches. I've also been perusing my interest in firearms. I can't think of anything else notable that I have done since the entry on the opposite page (above), yet I'd forgotten that lost feeling I used to have. The above activities are the only things I can attribute the lost feeling to. I hope I'm really dealing with these feelings and not just busying myself enough to forget about them.
More often lately I've been getting an overwhelming feeling of loss. Maybe loss isn't the right word. Maybe it's just incompleteness. I just get that whole rat race feeling. I go from day to day with few highlights, and think to myself that things will be different soon. Well I just kind of figured out that that is unlikely. It was a "this is your life" moment. I just got the feeling that I was trying to keep busy to avoid something, and I didn't want to avoid it anymore. I feel like I should be doing more, but I'm not sure what "more" is. There's something I miss doing, but have never done before. There's some intangible round peg out there, just waiting to make me whole. But what and where is it? Does anyone else feel this way?
5-9-06 (less belated journal post)
I've been drawing more, and have started scanning and coloring my sketches. I've also been perusing my interest in firearms. I can't think of anything else notable that I have done since the entry on the opposite page (above), yet I'd forgotten that lost feeling I used to have. The above activities are the only things I can attribute the lost feeling to. I hope I'm really dealing with these feelings and not just busying myself enough to forget about them.
Friday, March 03, 2006
OMGPANCAKESDANGEROUS
3-1-06
Renewed exaspiration at existencial junk.
...Just kidding.
I've decided that being prepaired (with tools) doesn't necessarily mean carrying everything you could possibly need around. Why carry tools around when you can simply make them more available? The 99 cent store has pocket knives and multi tools, flashlights, LEDs, etc. all for 99 cents. Sure they're crap, but a crappy tool in the hand is worth two awesome ones at home... Anyways, buy 3 sets of tools and keep the sets at home, in the car, and at work. You don't have to carry all of it around, but it's still readily available if you forget what you usually carry.
I seem to be getting tired of my music. What I usually listen to isn't affecting me as it used to. Truthfully, though, I haven't been giving it the undevided attention it problably deserves. I need to devote some time to it.
Every once in a while I really just step back and marvel at all the functionality linux has. I learned by messing around with Macromedia flash that powerful tool sare hard to control (read the "hole hog" section of "in the beginning there was the command line"). I was reading the steps involved in moving a shape across teh screen and was simply dumbfounded at how complex they seemed to make this simple task. After learning more I realized that this program was capable of very complex actions and activities, and that with out those complexities it would be a simple tool with simple functions. The exact same can be said about Linux. if you can dream it, you can do it. It may take some research and learning to accomplish it, but it can be done. This is where Lunux/Unix deviates from other OS's on a philisophical level. Ease of use comes at the cost of function. I wrote a one-line bash script that parsed the ssecurity logs, found IPs that had more than 10 failed login attempts, and blocked them. Doing something similar in windows would be extremely difficult, and require substantial programming prowess. Yet Linux/Unix has these small, single-function tools ready for use, and provides a means for combining them to increase their abilities. Macs are like shopping at Target for furniture; you have a selection of furniture ready made and functional. Windows is like shopping at Ikea for furniture; you may have to work to get it functional, but it's not really that hard (plus more selection). Linux is like being handed tools and pointed at a tree. It takes skills and knowledge to get your furniture, but you have the option of making whatever you want, however you want, from beginning to end.
There are countless projects that attempt to make Linux more user-friendly, but it's not in Linux's nature to be that way. So they will always fail on some level, to some degree. A tiger doesn't change its stripes. Especially when it's been bred to be a tiger's tiger.
Renewed exaspiration at existencial junk.
...Just kidding.
I've decided that being prepaired (with tools) doesn't necessarily mean carrying everything you could possibly need around. Why carry tools around when you can simply make them more available? The 99 cent store has pocket knives and multi tools, flashlights, LEDs, etc. all for 99 cents. Sure they're crap, but a crappy tool in the hand is worth two awesome ones at home... Anyways, buy 3 sets of tools and keep the sets at home, in the car, and at work. You don't have to carry all of it around, but it's still readily available if you forget what you usually carry.
I seem to be getting tired of my music. What I usually listen to isn't affecting me as it used to. Truthfully, though, I haven't been giving it the undevided attention it problably deserves. I need to devote some time to it.
Every once in a while I really just step back and marvel at all the functionality linux has. I learned by messing around with Macromedia flash that powerful tool sare hard to control (read the "hole hog" section of "in the beginning there was the command line"). I was reading the steps involved in moving a shape across teh screen and was simply dumbfounded at how complex they seemed to make this simple task. After learning more I realized that this program was capable of very complex actions and activities, and that with out those complexities it would be a simple tool with simple functions. The exact same can be said about Linux. if you can dream it, you can do it. It may take some research and learning to accomplish it, but it can be done. This is where Lunux/Unix deviates from other OS's on a philisophical level. Ease of use comes at the cost of function. I wrote a one-line bash script that parsed the ssecurity logs, found IPs that had more than 10 failed login attempts, and blocked them. Doing something similar in windows would be extremely difficult, and require substantial programming prowess. Yet Linux/Unix has these small, single-function tools ready for use, and provides a means for combining them to increase their abilities. Macs are like shopping at Target for furniture; you have a selection of furniture ready made and functional. Windows is like shopping at Ikea for furniture; you may have to work to get it functional, but it's not really that hard (plus more selection). Linux is like being handed tools and pointed at a tree. It takes skills and knowledge to get your furniture, but you have the option of making whatever you want, however you want, from beginning to end.
There are countless projects that attempt to make Linux more user-friendly, but it's not in Linux's nature to be that way. So they will always fail on some level, to some degree. A tiger doesn't change its stripes. Especially when it's been bred to be a tiger's tiger.
Monday, December 19, 2005
What's important?
12 14 05
Ah, the excitement. I’m bored in my flight. I’ve run out of attempted small talk topics. The clouds we’re flying above are like fluffy white sand dunes that stretch across a desert forever… So I was thinking about fabricating my own reality. Well, actually I was thinking about just accepting that all my reality could just be an illusion. I suspect things would be more interesting were I more mindful of the possibility that everything I see could not be there. What’s interesting is that your memories are mostly devoid of details. Do you remember the face of the last person who washed their hands next to you? Did you even look? In your memories, that person is not John or Joe, It’s just a person. Look at the people around you now. Whom among them are you going to remember in a day, week, month, year? How important can the world around up really be if a vast percentage of it is forgotten
Ah, the excitement. I’m bored in my flight. I’ve run out of attempted small talk topics. The clouds we’re flying above are like fluffy white sand dunes that stretch across a desert forever… So I was thinking about fabricating my own reality. Well, actually I was thinking about just accepting that all my reality could just be an illusion. I suspect things would be more interesting were I more mindful of the possibility that everything I see could not be there. What’s interesting is that your memories are mostly devoid of details. Do you remember the face of the last person who washed their hands next to you? Did you even look? In your memories, that person is not John or Joe, It’s just a person. Look at the people around you now. Whom among them are you going to remember in a day, week, month, year? How important can the world around up really be if a vast percentage of it is forgotten
Musings while taxi-ing
12 14 05
We’re on our second flight and I’m finding myself a little tense. I think it’s because I don’t’ usually fly on planes this small. The fear is entirely irrational but its fear nonetheless. Writing about it has calmed me a bit. I think too much. Actually I think I may be getting claustrophobic, coupled with my irrational fear, it’s making for an interesting cocktail. I can’t listen to my music until we take off, so I’ve got to cowboy up. The pilot just applied the breaks suddenly, and I got a mental image of some other plane cutting him off. (after which he would of course hand out the window and shake his fist in the air, while calling him an asshole) (in a New York accent, naturally). I’m upset I didn’t bring my monocular. There were some pretty great views to be seen. We’re taking off. No, someone else is taking off. We’re waiting. Looking at the big planes makes me calm. Here we go… *Death* just kidding. We’re still waiting. I suspect our tiny plane got bullied to the back of the line by the bigger ones. Waiting… The waiting is making it worse. Aahh! The girls next to me is writing in her journal and her writing is much better than mine! My pages always look like the ravings of an angry chimp. Still I like the hurried look, and my girlfriend liked that my notes to her were always (here we go…) (well that was faster and smoother than the big planes) very expressive in their writing style.
We’re on our second flight and I’m finding myself a little tense. I think it’s because I don’t’ usually fly on planes this small. The fear is entirely irrational but its fear nonetheless. Writing about it has calmed me a bit. I think too much. Actually I think I may be getting claustrophobic, coupled with my irrational fear, it’s making for an interesting cocktail. I can’t listen to my music until we take off, so I’ve got to cowboy up. The pilot just applied the breaks suddenly, and I got a mental image of some other plane cutting him off. (after which he would of course hand out the window and shake his fist in the air, while calling him an asshole) (in a New York accent, naturally). I’m upset I didn’t bring my monocular. There were some pretty great views to be seen. We’re taking off. No, someone else is taking off. We’re waiting. Looking at the big planes makes me calm. Here we go… *Death* just kidding. We’re still waiting. I suspect our tiny plane got bullied to the back of the line by the bigger ones. Waiting… The waiting is making it worse. Aahh! The girls next to me is writing in her journal and her writing is much better than mine! My pages always look like the ravings of an angry chimp. Still I like the hurried look, and my girlfriend liked that my notes to her were always (here we go…) (well that was faster and smoother than the big planes) very expressive in their writing style.
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